Can I Just Serve Non-Alcoholic Beverages At My Cocktail Wedding Reception?

Question from A LITTLE FRAZZLED

Hi Angela: My fiance and I love simplicity. We really want a casual, fun and green reception. Our budget is $5000 for 100 guests. We have booked a beautiful botanical garden patio which comes with an indoor space as well. Now the challenge is figuring out the catering/timing/no alcohol.

We are thinking of having guests arrive at 6:30pm, ceremony at 7pm and then have an hors d\’hoerves and dessert reception. For food, we were thinking of mini u sliders/fries, pizza, gnocchi and a fresh veg salad as well as a decadent dessert station. We will be setting up a couple of sofas and about 30 or so chairs. The wedding is in June so we will be providing guests water bottles, non-alcoholic signature drinks and a paper fan.

Do you think the timing is appropriate? Is it okay to just serve non-alcoholic beverages and a few food items but plenty of it? My research on the internet is mixed and now I am feeling very nervous and frazzled :(

Answer from The Wedding Expert:

Hi and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

Having your wedding ceremony at 7 p.m., followed by a cocktail reception is perfectly acceptable.  Your hors d’ouvres are casual and a matter of personal preference. As for seating, ensure you have places reserved for the elderly in your family so they have somewhere to sit.  The comfort of your guests is the main focus of any party you throw—whether it be a wedding or a birthday party. Your seating sounds fine.

Etiquette says that you must have champagne or wine to do the toasts, but no other alcohol need be served.  Your idea of non-alcoholic signature drinks is perfectly acceptable.

Food and music are always the main two things people remember about weddings, so ensure you have thought those through fully.

Regarding the food, you need to serve items that do not require people to sit down and eat.  Finger foods are best.  You say that you want a small number of hor d’ouevres, but lots of it.  I would suggest a little larger selection—lots of people have diabetes, high blood pressure and other ailments, and sticking to mostly fried food with a high fat content will be difficult for them.  My suggestion is to have more variety.

If I were planning your wedding, I would suggest items like soup served in little cups, little macaroni and cheese balls, petite swedish meatballs, chicken quesidillas triangles, and vegetable springrolls to keep it simple and inexpensive.  Little skewers with cooked meat cubes, mushroom caps, and triangles of peppers are a healthy alternative.  I would serve the salad in wafer cones to keep it simple, fun and green.  If you are wondering how many hor d’ouevres, I would suggest 3 or 4 more items.  They need not be complicated, just simple, healthy choices.  You can google hors d’ouvres for more ideas.

Your decadent dessert station is a popular choice, but remember those who can’t have sugar or chocolate—fruit and cheese & crackers is a good alternative for them.

As always, the pleasure of your guests is the first consideration of a good host.  Your wedding plans sound great.  Just add a few more items to the food list for those guests that have dietary requirements, and it is fine.

Good luck with your wedding plans, and feel free to contact me if you have further questions.

Angela Fiebelkorn, The Wedding Expert

 

 

How To Choose A Reception Site

Question from Mitch:

Hi Angela, I’m having some confusion on which reception venue to choose for my wedding next yr (March 2011). The top two that I have in  my list are RIO HONDO COUNTRY CLUB in Downey, CA and PACIFIC PALM RESORT in City of Industry.  I have received the quote and wedding packages from them.   RIO Hondo has cheaper catering cost for brunch – $26/head.while Pacific Palm is $40/head (adult) and $20/kids(just 15 out of 150 guests). However, Pacific palm will provide free cake, complimentary room and dance floor rental.  However, the reviews on the food for Pacific Palm is not soo good. I’m having some difficulties in choosing…hope you can help me..thank you!

ANSWER FROM WEDDING EXPERT ANGELA:

Hi Mitch.  It can be fun to choose where to have your reception if you have the right perspective.  First, find out what the cost the RIO has for the things that the PACIFIC PALM will throw in for free.  Then at least you are comparing the same services.

Another thing to consider is that at a wedding it is the food and the music that guests remember the most.  I suggest that you talk to couples who have had their wedding at the PACIFIC PALM in the last month or two, and find out how they found the food quality.  Cooks change regularly, so it is best to check references from past couples.  Having a ‘sample meal’ is not the same, as it is easy to cook a single meal as a sample, and a large meal is prepared differently.

Once you have done these things, the best price and food quality should become apparent.  Good luck and feel free to write again.

Angela Fiebelkorn, Ask the Wedding Expert

How To Decorate Your Wedding on A Budget

One of the biggest problems bride’s have is how to decorate their ceremony and reception site. In this article, I am going to talk about the first step of decorating for your wedding. Step one is not really HOW to do it, but more about WHAT look you are going for and the basics of how to create it.

reception tableIf you want a sophisticated, elegant look, you will mostly use neutral colours. Neutral colours are white, black and brown—all and any shades. Imagine white tablecloths, white napkins, and white chair covers. Then think black accents like a black table runner, wedding favours that are predominantly black. Bridesmaids in lovely silver grey dresses. Your flower bouquets or flower arrangements in any colour combination with black/grey ribbons. Very classy.

Don’t like black at a wedding? Replace it with brown. A deep rich chocolate brown instead of black gives a similar classic look without using black. For a soothing, beautiful look to a room, go with various shades of brown, from deep brown to beige. The secret to decorating with colours that are in the same tones, is to use texture. For example, think about white tablecloths and white chair covers. Layer a beige lace square over the tablecloths. The chairs can be accented with a strip of dark brown sheer fabric that can wrap around the chair back to create a bow at the back. Any flower colour choice would liven up the table, but the overall look is soft and subdued, calm and relaxing. You could pick any colour to go with a look like this.

If you want more of a WOW factor, the secret is contrast. For example, imagine white table cloths, white napkins, white chair covers—a classic white-on-white look. Then, think of any one colour, for example red. It would create contrast and a wow factor. The bigger the pops of red, the greater the wow factor. Small red flower centrepieces would look beautiful and create a wow due to it’s contrast. If you wanted bigger wow, you would have larger red flower centrepieces, for example, and add a similar red colour to drape and accent the head table.

If you wanted a nautical or beach flair to your decor, but still wanted that wow factor, imagine a white-on-white decor with pops of areception table decoration deep, rich blue colour. Having table runners in a simple blue and white strip would immediately give that nautical beach look while still keeping that wedding look. The secret to keeping a certain look classy without looking cheap or taking away from the wedding elegance, is to use those theme elements in a subdued way. The more you use the theme elements, the more you take away from the overall classic wedding look, and move into a theme party look. If the bridesmaid dresses were in the rich blue colour, and you used just that blue colour to accent the guest book table, buffet table, etc. it would keep the stripe in proper balance. Nautical or beach wedding favors could accent the theme in a fun way without taking away from the classy decor.

Another thing to keep in mind when planning your decorations is to have a focal point. The easiest place to create a focal point is the head table. Because the table height is the same as the guest tables, you need to create more height at the head table. One simple method is to rent a backdrop. They come in many shapes and sizes to fit any size head table. Whether you choose the ‘sunlight’ backdrop that give the illusion of windows, or a lattice backdrop to accent your garden theme, these are just a few of your options. Many reception sites have these available on site, or through a local supplier. If they don’t have it available, you can check out a local wedding rental supplier in your city.

If you wanted to create more of a wow factor to your focal point, a simple solution is to use a few tall flower or plant stands with the backdrop to add a greater pop of colour with your wedding flowers. These are readily available for rent at any wedding supplier, but always check with your reception site to see what they have available. Using table skirting and draping the head table in your wedding colours are also simple methods to accent the head table without breaking the bank.

These examples are all simple ways to decorate. You can get much more elaborate if you choose, but if budget is a factor, simple elegance with pop creates a great wow factor.

Wedding Reception Music

The music that you choose for your wedding reception will set the tone and mood for your wedding.  How do you know what music to choose?

The first decision is whether to have a DJ or to have a band.  Usually a band will be more expensive, but a good DJ will also cost good money, so depending upon your needs you should compare prices.

One of the first things to consider is how comfortable is the band/DJ with weddings?  Wedding are different than other events.  There are lots of opportunities for the DJ/band to MC the events, and have fun activities to keep the crowd entertained.  Regular DJ’s who just play music are usually not chosen for a wedding reception.  You want the guests to be entertained with fun activities, spot dances, and other activities—yet you don’t want those activities to take over the wedding.  A nice balance should be achieved by an experienced wedding DJ/band.

Then, the kind of music that will be played at the wedding reception is the next decision.  If the majority of your guests are older, as is common with a lot of wedding receptions, it is appropriate to play music they will enjoy.  The food and the music are the two things guests remember the most about a wedding, so appropriate music is very important.

It is common to start the evening with quiet dinner music, followed by music appropriate to the majority of the guests, at a volume that allows for conversation at the guest tables.  As the evening progresses, the music usually becomes more contemporary as the older guests leave.

Many wedding receptions have music like traditional waltz’s, polkas, chauteses, and the butterfly.  Alternatively, appropriate music for country dances like the 2-step and line dance are common.  Classic rock/pop from the 60′s, 70′s, 80′s, 90′s, and 2000′s are also common.  Ideally, a combination of all these types of dances is appropriate for some weddings.

Ask your parent’s for the typical dances for their generation, since many of the guests will be of their age.  You will be familiar with the music that your friends like, so you can also suggest that to your DJ/band.

Ethic songs are also a nice touch at a wedding, that also add to the overall wedding theme.  Think about latin influenced music, or specific songs that are common to your family tradition.

The typical types of wedding music are:  rock/pop, funk/hip hop, latin, R&B, country, dance mixes, big band/swing, or reggae. Whatever  your wedding music choices, be sure to consider the age of all your guests, so all will have an opportunity to dance to music they know and love.  Most people will not dance to music they do not know.

How Do I Do A Cocktail Style Wedding Reception? – Ask The Expert Answer

Question from Leah:

Hi!  I recently decided to do a cocktail style reception for my wedding.  We have too many guests for a sitdown dinner at our venue and don’t want to cut our guest list.  I was wondering if you have some ideas on how to keep the reception “wedding like?”  We want the elegance of a sitdown to dinner and want to incorporate some of the traditional components to a reception (ie. announcement of the wedding party, toasts/speeches, cutting of the cake, etc) I would like to have a head table still but don’t know how to do that because we are unable to have enough tables and chairs for all our guests. Do you have ideas on how to keep the ‘wow factor’ and have guests talking about the reception when most of them want the traditional sit down dinner?  What are some unique ideas for the cocktail reception.

Answer from Bridal Expert Angela:

Who Stands In The Receiving Line At A Wedding? – Ask The Expert Answer

Question from Ruth:

Hi again.  I have another question – who is it that stands in the receiving line – wedding party includes candle lighter, ring bearer, Maid of Honour and Best Man.  Do all of them stand in the receiving line, including the parents?  Also, do all of them sit at the head table (excluding parents).  Thanks!

Answer from Wedding Expert Angela:

Hi Ruth.  Nice to hear from you again.  Ah, yes, the receiving line.  It is a ‘rule of etiquette’ that a wedding has a receiving line, although if you don’t have a receiving line, the bride and groom must visit every person invited to the wedding during the evening.  It is much easier to do a receiving line.

THE RECEIVING LINE

A tradition, formal receiving line has, from right to left facing the guests:  the bride’s mother, the groom’s mother, bride, groom, maid of honour, and all of the bridesmaids.  If you so choose, the fathers can be included next to their spouse.  If the fathers aren’t in the receiving line, their “job” is to act as hosts (with the best man) at the reception site, greeting guests, and directing them to the bar for cocktails, and so forth.

A contemporary receiving line can include any of the wedding party that the couple wishes to include.  Usually, it follows this order:  mother of the bride, father of the bride, bride, groom, mother of the groom, father of the groom.

If parents are divorced and relations are strained, the receiving line can be:  mother of the bride, father of the groom, bride, groom, mother of the groom, father of the bride.

If the wedding is under 125 people, the entire wedding party can be included in the receiving line.  This includes the bestman, and groomsmen.  The bestman, will stand next to the maid of honour, and the bridesmaids and groomsmen will be with their wedding party partner inthe lineup.  If the wedding has over 125 guests, the receiving line is usually kept shorter:  bride, groom, mothers of the bride and groom, and the maid of honour.  Again, the fathers can be included or not, as you choose.

It is proper etiquette that each person in the receiving line greet the guest, and introduce them to the next person in the receiving line.  That “next person” then greets the guest, and introduces the next person in the receiving line.  This eliminates the need of your guests to create ‘small talk’ with each person in the receiving line.

If this is a second wedding (commonly called an encore wedding), the parents of the bride and groom will not be in the receiving line unless they are paying for the wedding.  If the couple have children, they can be included in the receiving line (if they want to be there).

THE HEAD TABLE

As for the head table, it is tradition to have the wedding party from left to right (when facing the head table):  bridesmaid, groomsmen, bridesmaid, bestman, bride, groom, maid of honour, groomsmen, bridesmaid, groomsmen.  In addition to this you would have a “parents’ table” (usually seated at the usual 8′ round table) which would have the officiant, groom’s mother, groom’s father, bride’s mother, bride’s father, and two spots of other important persons at the wedding.

The candle lighter, and the ring bearer are not included in the receiving line or head table, although you may choose to honour them by giving them a table of their own next to the parent’s table.  They should be seated with their family members, if at all possible, at this special table.

Many couples choose to also honour their grandparents by having a special table for them also, that could include other important family members—say god-parents, or close family members.

If you have further questions, feel free to ask.

Angela Fiebelkorn, Ask The Wedding Expert

How Do I Create A Ceiling Canopy For My Wedding? – Ask The Wedding Expert Answer

Question from Michelle:

What fabric would you recommend that I use to decorate the ceiling to make a canopy decor and a backdrop for my reception hall?  The hall doesn’t have any chandeliers, so I need to try to lift it up with the draperies, but unsure what fabrics to use or how to do it at all.  Please help with any ideas. Thank you.

Answer from Wedding Expert Angela:

Hi Michelle, and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.  The most common fabrics for draping at weddings are sinamay mesh, or tulle.  Both have a nice stiffness that lets you shape it, yet it drapes well.  Because they are net-like, you can have light garlands mixed in with it to create a fairytale effect with the lights.  If you use soft, silky fabric, it will just slide where gravity takes it (unless you want to staple it in place).

First, check with your reception hall to see what they have available in terms of backdrops.  Often, they have things available, or have sources for you to rent some.  There are many props that you can rent quite inexpensively, so I suggest you check the yellow pages in the nearest city and see what is available to you before you start building something.  Also check with them to see if you can use tape or staples on the walls or ceilings.   Many halls have rules about those things, so you need to see what you can actually do.

As for the ceiling, depending upon the lighting in the room, and how many windows it has (or doesn’t have) the ceiling might disappear in the low light.  Visit the site in the evening with the lights set like it would be for your wedding.  When you see it in that lighting, you might decide not to bother with the ceiling at all.

Another thing that you can do with lighting is to use “up lights”.  They cost approximately $10 each and can be used to accent the cake table, or light up the underside of the head table.  There are many options, and your reception site should have suggestions as they have seen many functions in their facility.

Another option is to hire a wedding planner or interior designer for the day to decorate for you.  If you consider the cost of purchasing things, and then the work of building what you want, it might be more cost effective to hire someone and rent what you need.  Phone around and get some prices.  You might be surprised.

Good luck, and if you have further questions, feel free to ask.

Angela Fiebelkorn, The Wedding Expert

What Are Some Wedding Table Centrepiece Ideas For a Fall Wedding? – Ask The Wedding Expert Answer

Question from Amanda:

We are going to be having a fall wedding and have no idea what to do for centerpieces! Neither myself nor my fiance can agree on any ideas the other
puts forth.

Our colours are chocolate brown, rose red, and burnt red.  We are using white to add a dramatic effect to the colours and to tone down the overall richness of the colours.  We are hoping for a dramatic centerpiece that is not too over the top at the same time.

Otherwise, we have no idea what we want. The location has hanging chandeliers which is creating a very romantic setting and we want to keep with that as well. Any suggestions at this point would be greatly appreciated! Hopefully we can agree on something sooner or later.

Thank you for your time!

Answer from Wedding Expert Angela:

Hi Amanda, and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.  My first thought was that white and red flowers would be very beautiful.  Or, imagine 3 or 4 white calla lilies in a tall vase with some greenery.

The usual things used for centrepieces are flowers, candles, lights, water, sand, rocks, or food (fruit, desserts).  This video on Wedding Reception Centrepiece Ideas will give you a fresh perspective.  Candles are a classic, not very expensive, and is always beautiful on a table.  Imagine a square mirror tile in the centre of the table with 3 or 5 pillar candles of different heights on it.  It reflects the light and is a classic dining room centrepiece.

Food is becoming more and more popular as a centrepiece.  A vase of fruit, for example, can be quite stunning.  Choosing a fruit like a pomegranite would work with your colours really well.  Desserts, say fudge, arranged in a pyramid or other shape around a small vase with a flower in it can look quite lovely.  You wouldn’t see the vase, only the flower with your chosen dessert surrounding it.

Water also makes a great centrepiece.  There are great water activated lights that can dress up a basic vase with flowers to give it added sparkle.  Just follow Reception Decorations to find the water activated lights.

This video at the end of the post also has some great ideas for wedding table centrepieces.  Good luck and I hope you find something you both like.

Angela Fiebelkorn, The Wedding Expert

How Do I Use Turquoise and Pink In My Wedding Decorations? – Ask The Wedding Expert Answer

Question from Larissa:

Hi! I`ve picked turquoise and pink, fuschia really as my two wedding colors, but I`m having a hard time deciding on how to combine them: on tables, wedding party attire, etc. I really want to incorporate touches of both but achieving a classy look. Thanks!

Answer from Wedding Expert Angela:

Hi Larissa, and congratulations on your upcoming wedding.  Turquoise sounds like a great colour to incorporate into your wedding party attire.  Turquoise dresses for the ladies, and the men can have accents of turquoise with their suits (tie, pocket napkin, cumberbund).  Add the pink through your flowers (bouquets and boutonnieres) to keep the look sophisticated.

As for the reception table decorations, this video might be helpful.  Consider the use of table runners, or chair covers to bring the colours into your decor.  Flowers will also accent your wedding colours.

Good luck, and if you have further questions, feel free to email again.

Angela Fiebelkorn, Ask The Wedding Expert

certified WPIC Wedding Planner

Gift Card Holders Add To Your Wedding Decor

reception-gift-card-holder

At every wedding, guests will bring a card to congratulate the happy couple.  These cards often have money in them, or gift certificates, and you want somewhere to put them that is safe.

Gift card holders are just the solution for holding all your wedding cards.  They come in many great shapes from a square to bird cage designs.  This particular gift card holder is made of metal and has a scrolling vine pattern, dazzling glitter, and a fun metal gift bow.  The card holder has a white cardboard insert that can be place on the bottom to prevent envelopes from falling out.

With many weddings today, cash gifts are common, and it is important to have a safe place to put all those envelopes once the guests have all arrived.  Putting the envelopes into a hotel safe, or locking it in the trunk of your car are good options.  Sometimes, a reliable person will hang on to the envelopes throughout the entire evening for the couple.

The beauty of the gift card holder will add to your wedding reception decorations, and give you a great place to keep your wedding cards.  In years to come you can use it for birthdays, and other occasions.